New and Improved Red Bull ANALysis

Before I get started - a tip. Do not, under any circumstance, google search James Riley without having Google filter out the adult content.


I watched the game again last night, and I have more complete opinions now. James Riley was AWFUL. He gave up possession on bad passes no less than 20 times, and on most of those passes he wasn't under any pressure. I'm going to chalk it up to his suspension and it being his first game of the season. Also, I think he was hurt some in training camp. That would explain why he doesn't seem to be in shape yet. He was not his usual exuberant self. So I think he's going to improve over the next few games, and by the time May rolls around, I won't have to single him out as somebody who played poorly.

Our boy Chewy also played poorly. Here's what I saw - a guy who just doesn't understand the game the same way everybody else does. His passes are a second too late, his touch is bad, and he doesn't really add anything to the attack or the defense. I'm going to stand by my opinion that Levesque is not a starter under any circumstance. He's probably okay coming off the bench because then everybody is tired and too slow to punish his bad decisions. But he shouldn't start again. Pat Noonan made a big difference when he came on. He made the right side of the field useful. He was able to hold possession, he made several smart passes, and if Montero had passed him the ball in the 75th minute when he was standing alone in front of goal, Noonan probably would have scored in his debut. But Montero hogged it, shot while falling backwards, and a defender easily blocked it.


Who played well? Alonso played well. He was all over the field and was involved in just about everything. Until late in the game, his passing was smart and effective. Zakuani also played well, and was probably about 6 inches from scoring on two of his shots.

Ultimately, nobody is surprised to see us struggle to score in this game. Finishing plagued us before and there's no reason that it won't plague us this year - albeit hopefully it is less of an issue. I think the biggest mistake in this game, however, was made by Sigi Schmid when he chose to start Levesque (sorry Sigi, acting like you didn't know he was bad isn't an excuse).


I hope that next week's game sees a lineup in which Noonan starts on the wing or up front with Montero. I think Ljungberg is most effective on the outside when he can operate in space - which is, incidentally, where he's played his entire life before coming to Seattle.


Also, a guarded apology on my part. I've ripped Brad Evans on countless occasions for his inability to know what's going on beyond what is right in front of him. In the first two games of the season, he has played MUCH better. His trapping and passing have been noticeably better, and his field awareness is much improved. Kudos to Brad Evans. Keep proving me wrong, big guy.

Red Bull Review

Shit. Frustrating game. Not much else to say. At least the tailgate went well. Stupid Bouna and Kandji.

Red Bulls Preview

"No, no. It's not a cow. It's a a minotaur. It's a creature of myth. And he got this one out of your mom's closet."


Danny Donahue - Role Models


"She let me keep it after I fucked her."


Wheeler - Role Models


Did you know that after last week's game, the organization that reviews performances by referees determined that our refs made a bad off-sides call, and robbed Nyassi of a goal? Do you know what else they robbed us of? Free haircuts. Yes. 3 goals = free haircuts. That ref owes me one haircut. And a rinse, because I don't want to go home and shower afterwards. Do your job. Ass.


I don't know what to make of NYRB. They looked decent in their opener beating Chicago 1-0, but it's hard to gauge what they will really be like from that one game. First game in a new stadium, under a new coach, and on a grass surface that is a 6522% improvement over the Meadowlands turf where they used to play. So was their performance the result of a renewed sense of optimism? Or was it the result of an improved squad?


Who really knows. Here's what I do know. I love donuts. I love bacon. I love guacamole. And NYRB won't be as easy to beat as they were in last year's opener, when SSFC embarrassed NYRB 3-0 without the services of Freddie Ljungberg. Oh, and NYRB has a new goalie - they no longer have Danny "Pizza Face" Cepero in the net.


Two big differences for NYRB. First, they have a new coach who seems to actually know how to coach. That alone should make them more difficult to score on. Second, they have a new player from Estonia who seems to be a good player - Joel Lindpere. That name doesn't seem very Estonian to me - that name sounds Swiss to me. Did you know that in 2000, the country of Luxembourg drank more liters of beer per person than any other country in the world? Amazing.


Back to the point. I don't really know how this game is going to play out. But if Freddie Ljungberg can play, I think SSFC will control possession. Whether they generate and finish scoring chances is the big question. 


I am pessimistic about most things in my life, but not about the Sounders. So I'll go with a scoreline of 2-1, with Zakuani scoring the second goal.


Now on to important matters. Saturday's tailgate looks to be interesting. Weather looks terrible. We'll be under the loud-as-hell viaduct again, but maybe we'll actually stay dry that way. I can't wait until we actually get to tailgate in the sunshine.