Next up- New Jersey Red Balls

Last year, Sounders FC opened up the season with a 3-0 win over the MLS Cup runner's up. Two goals from Montero and a third from Brad Evans got us off to a great start. This time around, New York is getting a lot of hype because of their new stadium and coach. Don't believe the hype! They are still crap, and nothing but a win will do this Saturday.

So here is the question- What is the lamest thing about the Red Bulls franchise? Is it the fact that their entire name/identity is tied to an energy drink that gives you a worse hang over than alcohol? Maybe you think its a bit pozerous to claim New York when they are from New Jersey? Maybe you are pissed that they only averaged 12,000 fans last year?

Also- Please include any ridiculously rude or catchy insults for their players!

Share your thoughts below...

It's Pat.... Noonan!

"You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make $14 the hard way?"
                Al Czervik - Caddyshack

How many obvious jokes can we make with this guy's name? I'll limit myself to a Caddyshack quote, but not one involving Danny Noonan.

So Pat Noonan is on trial with the Sounders. Noonan was formerly with the Columbus Crew, and prior to that he was a long-time contributor with the New England Revolution. No word yet on whether or not he's going to get signed to the roster, so for now all we can do is speculate. But I think there are two points to be made from him even being in camp. And I'll make them together.

A guy like Pat Noonan gets a trial with Seattle because Sigi is not entirely comfortable with the options he currently has at outside midfield and forward. That means that Jaqua is probably out indefinitely (they are not sure what's wrong with his groin or how to make it better - I think the problem is that he has a vagina instead of a penis), and that Sigi doesn't think that guys like Estrada, Chewy, Nyassi and Souter are capable of being everyday players.

I do not think that Chewy or Nyassi are everyday players. Nyassi is the posterchild for ADHD, hyperactive hypoglycemic. He can't sit still, and he can't stop running everywhere at full speed. Guys like that often find themselves out of position. Chewy just can't cut it for 70 minutes. He needs to come in when everybody else is tired, and his poor first touch won't get punished the way it does when everybody else's legs are as fresh as his.

Souter, well, we haven't seen much of him other than the Portland friendly. I wasn't impressed. That leaves Estrada, the top draft pick. If we're looking at Noonan, then apparently Estrada hasn't made Sigi comfortable enough to start him.

Miguel Montano is a bit of a wild card here, but I don't think he's going to play much until the SSFC starts competing in CONCACAF Champions League play later this summer.

I think Noonan would be a good signing. He is a solid all-around player who can score and do the dirty work. He's not going to solve our scoring problems. But he should be able to stabilize the right midfield position and make the job his. Hopefully, we won't really need him to play up front, but he can do that also. Overall, this move makes a lot of sense because it adds depth at the two places we need it. I think Sigi will sign him, and at the end of the year we'll consider his addition a smart one.

2-0 Means (Le) Toux Bad for Philly

I wasn't exactly right about the scoreline, but I would have been had Chewy finished his sitter in the first half. 2-0 is just alright with me, but 4-0 would have been even more just alright than Jesus. I'm not interested in a deep philosophical breakdown of the game, because Philly is awful and the conditions weren't ideal. But here are my thoughts:

1. We may still struggle to score goals until Kufo arrives
2. The defense still looks solid
3. Zakuani may be ready to live up to the hype
4. This team can get a lot better going forward

So we blew some opportunities. Happened last year, happened this year. At least we got enough to take three points. So I'm not going to sweat the poor finishing just yet. But it's on my radar.

The D - good performance. But they weren't really tested beyond the first 10 minutes of the game. Philly showed some decent ball control early, and it culminated in a shot on goal by Orozco, but Keller was well positioned and the shot was under enough pressure that it never really was very dangerous. After Sounders got the opening goal, they settled down and controlled the game. Even if they didn't have the ball, the D made sure that Philly's possession never amounted to opportunities on goal.

Zakuani tormented his defenders all night. And he found somebody with his crosses, which is progress for him. I still want to see him make the decision to run at defenders more quickly, so he takes advantage of the space behind them before other defenders move into supporting positions. But I also want a pair of soft leather knee-high boots. We can't have everything we want (I'll settle for a dark green cape, if anybody has one). At my most pessimistic, I can say that Zakuani's defender wasn't very good. But even in this mindset, I must admit that he took advantage of his man. Last year, even when playing against slower defenders, Zakuani often struggled to make an impact on the game. Not the case this time around.

SSFC looked good. This was a workmanlike performance in some pretty bad conditions. They got two goals, they got out with a clean sheet, and the only injuries were the result of Philly's strange knee-to-the-back fetish. They didn't look dominating, and that's fine. It's early in the season. The way SSFC played, there is plenty of room for growth. The passes and touches will get crisper and sharper, and fitness levels will improve. Ultimately, I think we're going to see Seattle be able to play creative attacking soccer this year that results in goals, not just clever interplay 40 yards from net.